In The Perfect Place...

I've been thinking a lot lately about where I'm at.

Or more accurately...where I've landed.

At one point in the description of sorts, about myself in this blog...I wrote, "I am not exactly in the place I ever thought I would be in my life..." I'm wondering now if I should erase it? I'm wondering if it sounds whiny? You see, I started this blog sometime after my divorce from a man, whom I was naive enough to think was my soul mate. This is, of course, before I changed my definition of soul mate to include anyone who's ever meant anything to me in my life...or anyone who's brought any illumination to my journey. Cause' honey, if we only get one chance at a soul mate, and that was it...

I'm screwed.

And...it took a while. A while of crossing my arms and stomping around in frustration and anger pursing my lips and pouting mostly because this wasn't how I pictured it turning out.

This was not my life.
No sir.

Only, it was.
And, it is.

I had no choice but to embrace my moment. To stop, in my tracks and change my direction...to finally reinvent myself again. What's the worst that could happen? To me, it already did. Now sometimes, I chuckle. I chuckle because I've landed on another side of this thing called life. Once I stopped struggling and sat down and faced it, stared it down and blew it a raspberry...well, it changed. I've recently slowed down and started to look around at where I've landed.

I've come to realize something,
just because I didn't plan this...I didn't predict this part...heck, I didn't even know it was coming,
doesn't mean it's bad or wrong...
It means I get to experience something I didn't know existed for me.

Last night when I was at my mother's and we were having this conversation (again) there is this part of me that yells, "There must be a reason for all of this...for what has transpired!" (all the while shaking my fist to the heavens) This was supposed to happen, right? Cause' there are no refunds if it doesn't work out...No returns if it doesn't fit right...

And, perhaps
just perhaps,
this is exactly where I am supposed to be in my life...
I just didn't know it.


And, perhaps
just perhaps,
I've landed in the most perfect place of all...
right in the middle of my life.


(and for those of you who know me...and are perceptive, you may have realized something is a little different in my life lately...more lightheartedness and fun...and I've been out and about with someone, but not mentioning names...if you skip over here...since he's "officially" outed us...lol...you'll see who I've been spending a fair amount of time with)