Still Life With Ice Cube Trays...

 

Allow me to introduce the newest latest greatest member of our clan (I crossed out all those words above, even though they all apply here...because her mother recently remarked she likes it when I write and cross out words...)  She was born not too long ago, and was so excited to meet us that she came early.She's wearing a jaunty jester hat that my mother kindly knitted for her tiny baby head.

Which smells divine

(her head, not the hat...)

Just like all new baby heads smell.

The very smell that when one is confronted with, usually creates a biological tightening of the mother parts of you leaving you a little breathless...which of course, makes you inhale more creating a rather diabolical circle of feelings.

If you could bottle New Baby smell and New Love Smell, you could rule the world.

Anyone who knows me could probably tell you that I'm currently holding onto the dream of having kids someday.  I've been noticing as of late that I am feeling like someday is coming quite fast, and I am tenuously holding this dream near my heart still...but sometimes?  I feel like it's slipping away.  But, it's my crazy dream...and I'm gonna hang onto it until those sands in that particular hour glass run through my fingers and I suppose we'll just have to wait and see what happens.

I'm tired of only being Aunt to this that and the other.

(all of whom I love dearly...but you know what I mean.)

Bringing me to a rather fateful conversation I held with Claudine the other day on the phone...she had called as she sometimes does during lunch only this day she was letting me know about a news story she'd heard only that morning about a new fertility study.

You know when a conversation starts out with, "I'm not sure I should tell you..." that you may be in trouble from there on out.

Apparently the gist of the study was that fertility wise, you're just fine and dandy up to age 30...and then?  Well something horrible happens to all of your eggs and you're less likely to get pregnant and if you do there's only 3% left...so good luck!

3%?!

What the heck have I been worried about all these years??

I mean, why sweat it out month to month not knowing if you'd not planned adequately?

Who does these studies?

Was this study trying to promote teenage and young pregnancy?

And more importantly, what the heck has happened to all these eggs?

Are they just falling out all over the place and you don't even know it?

I find it strange no one addressed that issue.  There's like a gazillion eggs in storage somewhere in your body and then *poof* just like that on your 30th birthday there's a rash burglary and you're left with 3%.

I'm not buying it.

Seriously.  Is this why some people talk about not being able to sneeze or laugh uproariously when they get older?  Is it because of all the eggs falling out and not a weak bladder like they claim?

It was at this point after talking about all the above that I laughed it off and told her that I knew plenty of people whom got pregnant in their 30's with absolutely no problems.  And sometimes?  Those people got pregnant on total accident even.

That night she went home and found the article and read it out loud to me.

Like either of us needed to hear any of this.

I mean...didn't some woman just get pregnant and deliver a totally healthy baby naturally in her 50's not too long ago?

I countered back with all sorts of statistics and on and on we went, round and round the baby carousel, until we got dizzy and got off for a bit...

Ending the conversation she gave a loud sigh and said, "I'm just worried.  I mean, do you think we should go somewhere and freeze our eggs?  Just in case?"

"No"I said,

"No...I don't think that will be necessary...I think will be much more economical if we just stand over an empty ice cube tray and sneeze."

I guess I should go to the store after work...