10 February 2010

...And I'll Wear It Tied Around My Neck If I Have To


Onions are apparently this season's cure all.  Or always have been only that we've somehow lost onion wisdom in the progression of Modern Medicine.

In case you haven't already heard:


In 1919 when the flu killed 40 million people there was this Doctor that visited the many farmers to see if he could help them combat the flu.  Many of the farmers and their family had contracted it and many died..

The doctor came upon this one farmer and to his surprise, everyone was very healthy.  When the doctor asked what the farmer was doing that was different the wife replied that she had placed an unpeeled onion in a dish in the rooms of the home, (probably only two rooms back then).  The doctor couldn't believe it and asked if he could have one of the onions and placed it under the microscope.  She gave him one and when he did this, he did find the flu virus in the onion.  It obviously absorbed the virus, therefore, keeping the family healthy. 


According to some hairdresser in AZ.  She said that several years ago many of her employees were coming down with the flu and so were many of her customers.  The next year she placed several bowls with onions around in her shop.  To her surprise, none of her staff got sick.  It must work..  (And no, she is not in the onion business.)

The moral of the story is, buy some onions and place them in bowls around your home.  If you work at a desk, place one or two in your office or under your desk or even on top somewhere.  Try it and see what happens.  We did it last year and we never got the flu.

If this helps you and your loved ones from getting sick, all the better.  If you do get the flu, it just might be a mild case..


Well.

You can only imagine what I was doing after I left Snap Snap yesterday.

If you guessed:  Running to the grocery for a yellow onion, you'd be correct!

I then went home, peeled it and cut the bottom off (just in case it needed to be cut as well, because some of the web sites about onions said that the onion needed to be sliced and spread around a plate) and put it in a bowl.  I then carried it around from room to room with me.  So, no matter where I was, so there was my onion.

I don't know if it succeeded in doing anything more than making me crave Italian food...but my cough was a lot looser last night (I did start taking cough medicine as well though...but the onion was a lot cheaper)  Which is making me feel relieved.  I'm not sure if I should have placed the onion around earlier in the season to prevent from even being sick at all, but I certainly hope it's pulling the flu toxins out of the air as we speak.   I mean, Mena was very interested in it last night and had to sit quite close to it and smell it and gaze from me back to the onion.

I can't imagine what was going on in her head.

Oh wait.  Yes I can:

"Stop coughing and look at me woman!  (looking at me) Have you gone stark raving mad?!  (looking back at the onion) Is the fact that you now have to sleep propped up on two pillows so you don't cough every breath finally catching up with you?!  (looking back at me) Get me some Italian food!"

Anyway.
Said onion didn't turn black from the amount of toxins in the air at Foolsewoode like one of my friends suggested it might...but it probably will if I leave it in that bowl long enough.

As it is, I am willing to try anything to get rid of this thing.

I'll wear the onion around my neck

I'll cut it up,  and tie it to the bottom of my feet

I'll slice the onion into rings and wear it on the sides of my head as Princes Leah hair

Because having this cold/flu? Is like having (and I'm trying to put this delicately) a combination of bronchitis and bulimia.  Because sometimes when you get started coughing, you...um.  Well, let's just say that I'm really hungry, nervous to eat anything, and I'm loosing weight.

Come on Onion!

3 comments:

"Lois Grebowski" said...

L'eau de Vidalia behind the ears........

wende said...

Oh, I hate to say this... *cough*codeine*cough! And Brandy works too, somewhat.

I hope you're feeling better soon. I read your juicy email. Thanks. I'm working on a response. :D

Anonymous said...

We're the sickies! :(

~Roz

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