28 August 2008

To Eat or Not To Eat...

I am hungry.

That's all there is to it, and to just take a moment to acknowledge what is right around the corner monthly speaking wise, fine...but it doesn't erase the fact that I have caught myself saying, "I'm absolutely starving!" more times to myself in the past 24 hours than I care to own up to. Now it's just like a song lyric I can't get out of my head...

I'm Starving...I'm Starving...

Drop a beat and you have to admit, it's a catchy tune.

It could have
started with taking my mum out to dinner at the local health where we ordered a guacamole delight. A kind of veggie salad/hummus/guacamole excitement all housed in a wrap, and in the past, they've been mighty tasty...Well, since the economy has been going by the wayside we've noticed the deli there is getting a little skimpy on things...this wrap barely had anything in it, including guacamole or hummus, which was neither delightful or filling. Plus, they didn't have the right wraps (or most of the ingredients it would seem, for this sandwich or other salad we both wanted to order) So, we sat down and used up so many calories eating that we were actually hungrier than we started.

This is where I think it started.

I am not starving by any means, and if I could just redirect my body to feast on the stored fat then I think we would be in business, but I can't seem to direct it there...it's too busy shouting things like "Taco-Bell" "French Fries" "Cupcakes" "anything fried!" (as it's wont to do this time of the month) it's also whispering in a rather conspiratorial tone, "...you don't need to go to the gym today, see...rest...eat...I'm starving, see!" (it's like having a bad old time gangster in here with me, no wonder I'm so hungry) And, my body knows how much time I spend at the gym trying to tone and slim...

Traitor.

I've been thinking a lot about willpower lately, and how, if I want to change a habit...I'm actually going to have to buckle down and do it and not give in to petty justifications or obsessions. Here that voice?!? I mean, heavens even Queen Latifah lost 20lbs on some sort of fabulous diet recently (and looks damn good, but I think she always looks good) surely I can use this as inspirational motivation enough to resist a fried food call to action

Why, just last week I was thinking, "Food? Food?! We don't need no stinking food!!" and then I would accidentally forget to eat...maybe I'm making up for lost time.

I promised the
voice that if we went to work out this afternoon, we could then have a special treat. I used that chipper parent voice we all have inside, I didn't buy it when my mother used it and to tell you the truth, I'm having a hard time buying it now...Even if I know I'm supposed to be in charge of my inner child. She really wants some sort of fried carbs (someone needs a nap...or a time out) Apparently I have no willpower, because the voice is stomping its feet and crossing its arms and suggesting not too quietly that we forget the gym and just go strait to a buffet.

And, I don't even like buffets.

12 comments:

Mary said...

I swear, some days I am so obsessed with food that it's amazing I can get anything else done.

Lois Grebowski said...

I'm so feeling it too!

TomboCheck said...

I think of food all day long. Between that and sex I have a surprisingly quiet mind. :P

Chy said...

I have this amazing friend who for the past few days has given me sugar. I think it is the only reason I really got up this morning to walk to see him before class! I think we should drop everything and do to the china buffet for lunch. I don't think that I even thought about a buffet till I read your blog!:)

tammy said...

I'm sorry, did you say something besides "cupcake"?

She sure is strange! said...

Go to the gym!!! Then see if you still want the treat. Have it and enjoy it and go for a nice long walk tonight. I'm all for having cake and eating it too.

Molly

Chickenbells said...

Mary - I've often wondered if I was able to redirect the food thoughts what would happen? I would probably be a millionaire...

Lois - What's the half way point for use to meet and chow down?

Tombo - Hmmmmm...Maybe that's why you're so thin? The thoughts almost cancel each other out...

Chy - How did you know I am also CRAVING Chinese Food?!?!?

Tammy - Apparently my hunger issues are seeping into the rest of the society because my Sister called yesterday to tell me, "...I just thought you needed to know that I got 6 of those tiny cupcakes we love..."

Unfortunately she lives in SanDiego.

Molly - Going to the gym actually makes me hungrier...I agree though, I can usually have a little bit of a treat and not feel bad...

nuttnbunny said...

Is there any way you could convince herself that going to the gym is a treat? I know it wouldn't work for me but...

:-)

(And speaking of but(t), I just came from the Dr. and he asked that I drop 15lbs. Oh, for Godsake!!!)

flutter said...

preaching to the choir my love

velvet brick said...

The ying and yang of the food relationship....
one of the most confounding things in the world!
Some days I could care less about it...other days it's like spiritual experience!
Go figure!
xoxo
VB

Kristin said...

haha I have those days too..I eat and eat and eat..and still want to eat some more, but you have way more willpower than I..haha

Chickenbells said...

Nuttbunny - Funny...you look very slim in all of your pictures! And NO...going to the gym stopped being a "treat" when my body figured out it was sweating.

Flutter - We are a lot alike in that way aren't we?

Velvet Brick - Yes! Just a mere day after I wrote this post, I got so stressed out, I only ate grapes and some green beans...the entire day...harumph!

Kristen - I don't know about that...I just try to eat a few bites of something I really want, because if I even start to think that I'm depriving myself? It's ON!

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