It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like...

...a damned marketing nightmare

* OR *

we're gearing up for another tacky holiday...

that's what.

I tell you, I love the holidays, really I do...but for those inward reasons. And by that I mean memories (and not just all the food) Memories of how the house smelled growing up when I would walk through the door from the bus stop in the cold after school (and yes, it actually was uphill...but in all honesty not too far from my house, and we're in AZ so when it did snow a lot, as it was prone to do when I was younger, school was usually called off...but don't tell my future children) the mix of fresh pine tree and gingerbread, or something equally as wonderful would hit me full force when walking in from the cold (my mother was a hippy in her younger days, although, I wouldn't think one could grow out of something like that...and she was an amazing cook...I say was because she only eats raw food now) So, there was usually something good brewing somewhere.



I remember the candle creche scene she would set up every year using the candles she's been collecting since she was little...which prompted me to start collecting my own (which means I get the most amazing gifties from mom, like all these new ones she brought me...when she runs across them...) And, I remember the stories we used to read...stories that were ripped from some womens magazine also from when she was a child...and we got to pick one out a night, and cozy up.



And, decorating the tree...putting it in the front window of the house and me begging every year to put lights on it, and my mother, who does not like lights on her tree, because she thinks:
1. it's tacky
2. we got real trees then, so it may dry the tree out presenting a fire hazard...
which means the minute I could put up my own tree as an adult, you can bet, up went the lights (drying up the tree to a matchstick, of course.)

We switched suddenly one year from our own childhood ornaments to her collection of vintage ornaments, prompting me to take $4 and buy my own tree and set it up with my own ornaments...and accidentally buying one of the most valuable collectible Christmas things I have...a pink aluminum tree...apparently the most coveted of all the colors of aluminum trees...who knew? (Though you can't put lights on these either, as they are prone to explode...why must the holidays end in a firey inferno?) Memories, of the year My Sister took one of the hand blown glass vintage horn ornaments, went to blow on it to see if it worked, and sucked instead, and ended up with a lung-full of godknowswhat glass and dust probably...making us all chuckle and act concerned at the same time...(and as a small disclaimer, I only put the pink tree up the first Christmas after the divorce because I felt so damned sad about the holidays...I got a new tree last year, but I'm saving the pink one still...and yes, that is a sock monkey tree-topper...cause' nothing says Merry Christmas like sticking a tree up a monkey's butt OR a tree on fire apparently)

I don't want to gripe about all the decorations coming out in stores too early, forcing me to look at someone's idea of a good ole' fashioned Christmas...in October...but, I was a little shocked this last week when I walked into my local thrift to see the "50% Off all Halloween Items" pasted up on the door...

...cause' they were making room for the Christmas Stuff...

I kid you not.

They were putting out Christmas stuff. At. The. Thrift...Halloween has not even happened, and Thanksgiving is a glimpse away...and I don't even care to think about how many days until Christmas (although, I'm sure I could put up a little counter on the sidebar) and there they were, knee deep and butt up in huge boxes of Christmas donations (and I hear tell the entire attic is full of stuff) I tell you what, it stopped me in my tracks...well before I started looking around (mostly because how often do you see a wiggle-butt sticking out of a giant box? Well, that and cause' you know I need me some more vintage holiday stuff...God, please don't let there come a day when I am found expired under a pile of collectibles...amen.) I found a box of vintage ornaments with the fake glitter snow stuff on them (I didn't want to buy them...but they were only 20 cents...I mean, come on...how could I leave them there?!)

And then...I found the adorable 4-some of bobble-thingiess...which prompted my mother to say both "OH!! They're sooo cute!!" and "We buy the weirdest things no one else would want!" both in the same breath (we're fast talkers) which was almost exactly what I was thinking when I picked them up...(they were 10 cents a piece and originally from Japan and have some age as the paint is a bit crackled, and honestly? I haven't seen prices this cheap since I was quite a bit younger thankyouverymuch)

We've got a mouse that has a little bucket of water, and a duck (whom I thought was a snowman, but I guess not) that has some sort of long metal thing he's holding which we immediately deduced to mean that he was fencing with the rabbit fellow there, and had cut off his arm (that's why it's missing, you know) And...and Indian playing a drum (I have no idea where he comes in, although perhaps he fell off a viking ship where he was keeping time for the rowers on his drum and then startled the rabbit, who lost his hand...all while winning the heart of the mouse-maiden who was getting water) I have no clue what any of these little wooden beauties have to do with any holiday, much less Christmas....but, they make me quite happy as small vintage wooden toys are wont to do.

I was trying to sneak out after picking up this armload when the girl stopped me and asked me why I wasn't getting more? I drew myself up and replied,

"Oh...well, um...you see...I have so much Christmas stuff...I have to be really picky about what I buy.."

She made a face at me (I think there may have been eye rolling involved)

You see? You see what happens when the stores put out stuff before the holidays? I can't help but buy these great vintage finds...

yeah...

you should see the plastic deer I picked up for this fine gal...so she can glitterize them...

Stomp out the tree...stop drop and roll...and let the Tacky Begin...